**** MATURE READERS ONLY ****

I recently sat down with Ron and Jim, the creators of www.bannedatatvnews.com to discover why the site was online and what kind of lunatics would start it. What was quickly discovered were two guys my age that simply wanted a place to chat and hang out with no rules, politics or the same mindless dribble found on so many sites today.

Our discussion lasted over two hours late into the night and the amount of information passed around was crazy. I did my best to recreate the scene; this is ‘sort of’ how it went:

[AEM awaits 9pm phone call. In typical BAAN fashion the call comes in around 9:32. Assholes.]

AEM: Hey guys, how’s it going?
BAAN: Good, hang on we need to sit closer.
AEM:  Errrr,  ummm,   OK?

AEM: So anyway – How long has BAAN actually been around?
BAAN: Close to four years with about 12 major crashes where we lost the entire system.

AEM: So you have actually had to start over that many times?
BAAN: Basically. We would crash the server or database and have to start from scratch, it sucked.

AEM: How did you come up with the Name?
BAAN: We were sitting at Perkins one afternoon bitching because we had been booted off of ATV News [again] and decided we would just start our own little world to pander our behavior on. Basically we had no choice; we had run out of email address’s to use to sign up with new accounts and had no place to call our internet home.

{BAAN cell phone rings}

AEM: Uh-oh, the little woman calling?
BAAN: Na, it’s just a buddy wanting to grab a beer.
AEM: Cool, so are both of you married?
BAAN: Married with kids.
AEM: So how do your wives feel about the site?
BAAN: Well they get in some occasional lurking but otherwise could care less and sluff it off to childish ‘man behavior’.

AEM: Well I know you mentioned kids. Your site clearly NOT a family site.
BAAN: No, it’s not. And we make that clear in our warnings and when we promote the site. It’s basically a place for adults to go and act like 15 year olds with an ATV theme. One thing we promote as parents and site owners is that it’s the parents responsibility to protect their kids from the internet, not ours. In fact our own kids have never seen the site and they are old enough to play online. We simply take precaution to stop them. It’s called ‘parental responsibility’ some people on this planet should learn it and stop blaming others.
AEM: I agree 110%

AEM: So what kind of content do you prefer to see on the site?
BAAN: Well it really doesn’t matter. Most subject matter is short lived or makes no sense anyway. We really do not have many snivlers, whiners or babies. We also stray away from politics and stick to the basic low interest discussions for people looking to have fun and enjoy their time on the site.

AEM: So are most members short term?
BAAN: Not the active ones. One thing we have noticed over the years is that when someone joins and starts posting they tend to be around for the long haul. We have a ton of lurkers, people who are just nosey or are too chicken-shit to post.

AEM: What has your growth been like?
BAAN: Explosive. The last six months have shown more growth than the last few years.

AEM: Where do you see the site in two years?
BAAN: Right where it is, a steady growth rate and no bullshit. We don’t want things to become a pain in the ass or a headache. But we would like to see more input and interest from people who visit the site. We like how there is a not of nonsense on the site, but still a ton of information – if you read between the lines.

{BAAN cell phone rings}

AEM: Whos queer ringer is that?
{solid laughing by all}
BAAN: If you think that ones bad you should hear Death’s. His plays ‘It’s Raining Men’.
{slight pause – then uncontrolled laughter}
AEM: Good info, I guess…

AEM: So what kind of problems do you guys encounter with the site?
BAAN: Fucking spammers. They are worse than the degenerates on our own site.
AEM: So you see a lot of bots and spam accounts?
BAAN: We delete ten accounts some days. They are a real pain.
AEM: Speaking of being banned, do you ever ban people from BAAN?
BAAN: Hell yes, last year we had some mouthy assholes show up tossing racial slurs and a lot of bullshit out, they got the boot quick.
AEM: So I take it even BAAN has things are taboo or not allowed?
BAAN: Of course, we allow a lot of stuff, but racial crap and other morbid shit is simply not welcome. Even adults don’t want to see that stuff. Some might, but the majority or walking humans don’t. We are also cautious of subjects that involve bullshit politics, conspiracy theories or anything that degrades our country. We are very loyal to our country and our freedom.

AEM: What about advertisers, do you want any or need any?
BAAN: It would be nice, but not necessary. I think we scare off most vendors from wanting to advertise. We are slightly over the edge of being ‘PC’ in the wholesome world of ATV racing.
{burst of laughter}
AEM: So does that mean if approached you would accept advertisers or product testing?
BAAN: Of course. We are immature and childish, but we are also racers and love everything ATV – except Yamaha.
{laughter}
BAAN: We would actually like to do a few product tests in our own way on our own terms. No bullshit or lies. If it’s junk, so be it. We like to call a ‘spade a spade’. Sure we are a Honda bias site, but we even allow Yamaha owners to post from time to time.
{laughter}

AEM: I have to admit I can’t look at your site from my office. The content can be a little too risqué. Ever thought about toning it down?
BAAN: Hell no! We have a motto about that kind of complaint: ‘fuck em!’. It’s not our problem. Besides, shouldn’t you be working?
AEM: Nevermind, next question…

BAAN: Hey! Do you know if there is a program to spam the spammers?
AEM: Ummm, let’s move on.

AEM: You have no logo? BAAN: Ya, we are pretty much just lazy. We have seen the one for this interview and may adopt it. The reality is if we don’t adopt it we will never have one. We are basically newbies and have no design skills. {laughter}

AEM: What about your members, good people?
BAAN: Fuck yes they are! How may sites can honestly say that the members travel to visit them as friends and spend time with them away from the site? If you have food in the cupboard and beer in the fridge we are there!
AEM: Ummm,  I have neither…
BAAN: Actually we want to thank all our original members and our adopted member Ken. Those scumbags have been with us since day one and it’s been a blast because of them.

AEM: What about woman visiting the site?
BAAN: What about them? Most can take care of themselves. There is no protection we are an ‘equal opportunity’ site. We would never allow personal attacks or hard-core banter, but if you can’t laugh at yourself and give digs back you have no reason to be on the site anyway. Most of the ladies that come to our site can handle themselves better and tougher than some of the guys. They can put the smack-down harder than some of the guys, like Death. They bring a whole new dimension to the site.

AEM: I hear there is some kind of trophy or contest among members.
BAAN: You mean the ‘Middle Earth Cretins vs The East Coast Bastards’? If people want details about that they can visit the site. But you can tell those East Coast fucks that “trophy is coming home to the Cretins this year!”.

AEM: What’s up with the Bra as an award, it says ‘Losler’ on it?
BAAN: Some dumb ass was making the ‘Loser Award’ and got too drunk. He was supposed to write ‘loser’ in glitter sparkle pens but was so drunk he wrote ‘losler’. It has stuck ever since and only makes winning the award that much more disgraceful. What a dumb ass.

AEM: Who comes up with the ideas?
BAAN: It’s the food at Perkins. Many stupid ideas we have followed through with have come from there. It’s a place we can go and bitch about everything – most people are too old and can’t hear us. Our most recent addition is the ‘Bitch/Dickhead Award’. It’s definitely not a coveted award, but it’s catching on!

AEM: Any closing comments?

BAAN: We want to make sure people know that if they visit the site it’s about fun. Serious conversations are welcome and do happen from time-to-time but nothing ever stays on topic for long. You can’t show weakness or anger. If you do it’s on! Seasoned members will decimate you and probably make you cry. Online forums are about fun, there is no sense in getting all heated over stupid shit. If you want mindless serious stuff go somewhere else. If you want to have fun and laugh come visit BAAN!!